Getting to know you

I have focused on finding the Burt I know within the damaged man he’s become. Today, I realized that I needed to also look at who he is. It’s time to get to know my Burt as he is now.

Getting to know him entails accepting the change. I know, I know he has dementia and with that cognitive decline, lack of commonsense, a different perspective on the logical. It should be clear he is a changed man.

It’s tempting to ignore his more nonsensical exclamations. In fact, I try to ignore those. Unfortunately, they are part of who he has become. I realized that I didn’t know who he is becoming and maybe should stop avoiding “meeting” him where he is.

Sometimes, there’s that glimmer of who he was. It comes as a flash of anger or a moment of love.

I have spoken of how very emotional. he is. He has always been sentimental. His LBD has given greater scope to all his reactions.

This morning, I realized I needed to listen more intensely. There is a man I don’t fully know expressing himself.

Getting to know him in all these facets is what I owe to our relationship.