My therapist gave me a list of feelings to try to refine my self-assessment.
I should look at & consult. What can sadness and sorrow mean or incorporate?
I feel bored, too, and guilty for that and other lapses in my care.
Worried falls under Fear for example. Guilt includes Regret Sorry Remorseful none of which feel like guilt aka this is my fault or I am at fault. Alphabetically guilt is followed by Hopeful.
Powerless lists Impotent Incapable Resigned Trapped Victim while Stressed / Tense leads to Anxious Burnedout Cranky Depleted Edgy Exhausted Frazzled Overwhelm Rattled Rejecting Restless Shaken Tight Weary & Worn out. Unsettled / Doubt doubles back to include Apprehensive again, as well as Concerned Dissatisfied Disturbed Grouchy [I pickup on grouchy] Hesitant Inhibited Perplexed ot Questioning & Rejecting.
Apprehensive and Hesitant can also track as Fear as does Frightened and Anxious.
This is the BIG THING from which I started my research: Despair / Sad Anguish Depressed Despondent (that’s too full a word, I think) Disappointed Discouraged Forlorn Gloomy Grief (stricken, I say) and of course Heartbroken Hopeless (and we are all familiar with how) Lonely (this journey is.) Longing Melancholy Sorrow [oh, yes] Teary Unhappy Upset Weary Yearning.
Bored, an old bug-a-boo of mine falls under the oddly titled Disconnected / Numb, along with Aloof Confused Distant Empty & (lord knows I am not) Indifferent (but yes to)
Isolated. You are free to explore if Lethargic Listless or Removed fits and, likewise Resistant Shut Down Uneasy Withdrawn.
Fear (let’s list and analyze all of it) Afraid & Anxious (kind of or some of the time) Apprehensive Frightened Hesitant Nervous Panic(ky, I tend to get that way) but not Paralyzed Scared or Terrified, (and then again a big yes to) Worried.
Panicky connects to Rattled, which is under Stressed / Tense.
Feelings are listed on this chart in the context of a logo that says “hoffman,” when you’re serious about change.”
It’s clear from any perspective how very complicated all this is. I mean, feelings, emotions, change. I mean grief, sadness, sorrow.
【It’s 6:30am so I allow myself to get up.】
this is our life 
Oscar the Grouch has nothin’ on me some days, Tamara. This list is exquisitely tender and spot on. Adding only RESENTFUL, at Lewy, not LO. And “Yes, everything happens for a reason and God doesn’t give you anything you can’t handle — would you PLEASE SHUT YOUR MOUTH Pollyanna!” (Does that have a word?) And oft times INCOMPETENT.
Is it useful? Yeah. I’d rather feel these crappy feelings than be numb, even when it feels like razor blades some days. When I’m willing to feel my feelings, identify them, can I accept them and love myself anyway on this imperfect partner path.
You rock.
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As do you.
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