And ice breakers
The party for Burt on our 35th anniversary was a treat. There was so much loving energy in that room that we all knew he was there.
It was unnecessary but I had prepared a little ice breaker based on the Burt approach.
He made friends in our building both before Lewy and after Lewy. Many of them were there for this celebration.
Before, [probably before], he would ask you if he met you in the hall: “Do you live here? What do you do?”
After Lewy, he would invite new neighbors over to my surprise and dismay. The dismay, mind you, not over having company in but over my being unprepared to hostess.
We’re going to try his approach to get to know each other now, I announced. Ask and Invite is the getting to know you game I asked our friends to play in Burt’s memory.
By the time I introduced this plan to the beautiful crowd gathered for him, it was clear everyone was already practiced in it. The room buzzed with conversation.
Just the kind of party made for Burt: people and food. I want to thank all the people who joined us on this special day. [And to those who were, like Burt, there in spirit.]
The food, prepared by the folks at the pizza parlor ristorante was excellent. And abundant. I chose the spot for its convenience [to me]; it’s up the block. Dress and walk over.
Italian Village also comes with this memory: Thrilled by his 84th surprise birthday party [2023], which was at home, Burt wanted to treat me for lunch the next day.
He used to go to Italian Village with his aides a few years back so Italian Village was where he was taking me. Close as it is, those 2 long avenues were a punishingly hard walk for him with his walker.
We sat in this back room where we now held a remembrance for him. He ordered scrambled eggs and french fries and ate only a little of whatever came.
Over the years, we had shared many meals at restaurants throughout the city. We didn’t go out often once he was ill, maybe just three times in all. Always at Burt’s urging. And it was here at Italian Village that we shared our last restaurant meal.
Well, not quite last, if we acknowledge as we do that Burt was there and we had a hell of a party. In his honor.
this is our life 
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