Recollecting Burt’s time in the rehab center today gave me a little relief although the memory was hard. The fact that I could affirm that I stood for him when he needed my protection felt good.
The nursing home-rehab was not a good place. I would not have placed Burt there over the long haul. I did choose to keep him in the facility longer than Medicare allowed because he needed the PT. I knew I could be his advocate while he was there. I had to be.
Advocacy was a necessity. I was insistent that the doctors here not change his meds; they did at first and I argued against this. It took a little doing but that was my brief, to advocate for him. I had to push to make sure Burt got the physical therapy he needed.
It was sad to see how many of the residents of this place had noone to speak for them. Most had no visitors in all the time Burt was there. I visited every day and usually spent 7 to 9 hours with him. I brought him treats and at times some for his roommates.
There were four men in Burt’s room. We wound up there after three moves. First, we were in a quarantine because Burt had had Covid in hospital.
The move to another floor put Burt in a room with just one roommate. I had some critique for the CNAs and my [honestly] gentle rebukes got us a transfer to a floor where the patients were screaming. It felt and looked like a psycho ward.
This time I did not protest to the charge nurse but went to the patient ombudsmen. It felt like that would be more effective. It was.
We moved to what was our last room at this facility. Most patients were residents but there were some transients, like Burt, on this floor.
We settled in and I made nice to the workers at the nursing station; I ordered pizza for the staff. I invited the charge nurse to lunch.
My bribes weren’t much help in getting Burt the attention he needed or deserved. I hired aides to come help out since it was clear the staff was stretched thin.
When the time came to bring Burt home, I had misgivings. I worried that I couldn’t provide proper care. Burt was able to walk with a walker. He was partially incontinent. He needed continuing PT. We took on extra help to help with his return. I continued in my role as his advocate and protector.
We spent the next two years enjoying as good a life as we possibly could. That’s all anyone can do, the best you can.
this is our life 