I am still in that crazy but comforting space where Burt is present. While eating protein oats, I am wondering if only I had had Magic Spoon high protein o’s for him could I have prolonged his life? Then I wonder if he would benefit from that; would he want his life extended; would heContinue reading “HiProtein O’s”
Category Archives: Love
Your story
Memory fades. Not just yours, my dear which was strangely altered and crippled by the dementia with which you suffered. Everyone’s. It, like the hearing of which couples complain, can be selective. Or just inaccurate. It was a gift to me when you recounted so much of your life story to me. Some of itContinue reading “Your story”
Another trove of pix
Yes, dear, I do
Do I miss you, darling?You, of all people, know.You know I miss you, And, even, I’ll bet, howDeeply I miss you. It isIntense, this absence ofYours. Yes, I miss you,Dear. Yet, also, I live myLife, a life different fromThe one we shared, theOne I miss when I say I miss you, darling, so Much. IContinue reading “Yes, dear, I do”
Listening
I routinely go through my picture trove on the phone. The photos and videos of Burt are starred. This is what stopped me as I went through the cache today. Burt’s voice in these snippets is so sweet to hear. I am so grateful! This one above was the first one I uncovered. It still makesContinue reading “Listening”
Protected
Were you my protector? Perhaps. Yes, I can see you in that light; as My companion, and the one holding Me tight, your arms a protective Circle, you by my side, caring and Guiding. Protecting me, you, my Champion always by my side. You Were my protector. Yes, and my Companion, my friend, my loverContinue reading “Protected”
I remember
There is a phenomenon of memory that I am just now observing. It feels like it happens backwards. Let me clarify if I can: I am not drawn to act on the memory, rather it coincidentally comes to me as I go about doing what I would do. But, what I do is not coincidental.Continue reading “I remember”
I was safe. I thought I was safe.
The above is a prompt from Wild Heart’s Miribai Starr- well the second half is. She is guiding the grief workshop to which I am listening. It debunks some myths about grieving. [Wild Heart and Holy Lament, a grief community, is led by Miribai and Willow Brook.] I thought I was safe; it’s not theContinue reading “I was safe. I thought I was safe.”
Emotional logic
We like to think that we’re logical creatures but our minds belie this hope. Logic is buried in a web of emotions. Burt, it seemed, wasn’t aware that I went with him to the park on our weekend outings. I noticed this when I recapped the Sunday. We went to the pickleball court, I said.Continue reading “Emotional logic”
this is our life 