I did not prepare an obituary for Burt. Not even for the May 3rd memorial celebration of life. Who he was is laid out in the pages of this blog, even though you’re meeting him during his journey in illness. I have sprinkled memories from the before among my posts. Some of you knew himContinue reading “Burt’s life”
Category Archives: Grateful
Dear Burt,
You gave me a full happy life. We were lucky to find each other. Lucky, or destined? I’m not sure if either luck or fate belong in modern life. Or love. It was my joy and an honor to be with you each and every one of those nearly 35 years. Did we have disagreements?Continue reading “Dear Burt,”
The theater
We were regulars on Broadway, off, off-off. We attended dance and jazz performances. We went to pop concerts and some opera. When I string that out like that, I wonder how we found the time. As he approached the beginnings of his dementia, sitting through a ballet or staying for a show became a challenge.Continue reading “The theater”
Connect the dots
Every conversation…. no, it’s not the conversation. It is I. I am the one who pulls memories out of every and all conversation. I connect to something I hear so I can probe my memories of Burt more deeply. I seek a deeper remembrance. He’s connected to everything I hear and everything I speak ofContinue reading “Connect the dots”
Burt, or, Burt and I
Burt and I was a radio program with a heavily-inflected Maine accent. It was homey. It was smart.
Speaking of gratitude
As I suggested to you, because it was suggested to me, it really helps us focus on the caring when we note at least one positive interaction with the one we love. I dare say, this is true in civilian life also but for us who are caregivers, it’s a monumental help. I had twoContinue reading “Speaking of gratitude”
Basic Burt
In the course of an hour or so, Burt was holding on tight to his aide’s hand. He took mine with his free hand and continued an elaborate explanation. His chat was freewheeling and pleasant. He’s been sweet like this of late. No arguments or accusations. This is Burt down to his basic self. He’sContinue reading “Basic Burt”
Neglect
Sometimes, it feels like I am so torn up over the national outrage as it swirls around that I am not paying enough attention to my guy. Before you voice any alarm, know that I dearly love him. I will always tend to his needs. Love feeds and fuels me, so I am happy toContinue reading “Neglect”
Call and response
“Burton Philip… we’re having a good day.” I am quoting the random callout Burt made last night. His conversation is ongoing, and he is addressing someone with questions and a flow of dialog. This is an evening ritual. Who am I kidding? These exchanges can go on all day long. My friend J is right.Continue reading “Call and response”
Time passes
A gratitude Time is an ironic boss. It passes. It moves so slowly that it’s as if someone forgot to release the break. At the same time (or by the same token), it rushes past us in a blur. In those instances (in those moments), we are caught off guard by the whirlwind. We sometimesContinue reading “Time passes”
this is our life 