A few short months have passed since I thrilled at how well Burt was doing. He truly enjoyed his surprise birthday. That was in November when a group gathering to celebrate him was a very welcome experience. He made it through my birthday party in early February. It made his decline by the middle ofContinue reading “My gratitude journey”
Category Archives: Grateful
Bluey
I started watching cartoons with Burt because they were colorful with plots that were easy to follow. The default mode for him is to misinterpret much of the action anyway. His “favorites” like Law and Order were too complex. And for my two-cents too violent. I worry about how he’s processing events on Columbo. WeContinue reading “Bluey”
Burdens. Joys.
Gratitude is a “thing” for the 2020s Era, but it is also a very powerful tool. This way of seeing and being opens us up to joy and enjoyment. I feel free to be grateful even for my sadness and my sorrow. With that, I feel even greater gratitude for pleasures, joys, and enjoyments. BurtContinue reading “Burdens. Joys.”
Growth
What experiences in life helped you grow the most? Let’s look at the question in the all- consuming context of caregiving. Other experiences have contributed to my professional growth. They found a place on my resume. Falling in love helped me grow in my heart and soul. Then along came my love’s dementia and IContinue reading “Growth”
Is it challenging?
What is the biggest challenge you will face in the next six months? Staying positive and appreciating the opportunities that caregiving offers is the biggest challenge. It’s too easy to find the hards in the journey. Focusing on those makes it just a little harder. Looking at the love that binds us together as weContinue reading “Is it challenging?”
I love you
Reassurance is important for my person with dementia. I slip and forget sometimes. I realized this today when I said, “I love you, sweetheart.” He did not respond with an “I love you too,” but with “you didn’t tell me in a long time.” His remark serves as a reminder to me to say “IContinue reading “I love you”
Giving my best. Doing my best
Burt expects me to deliver my best self. He knows it doesn’t always happen. “I’m doing the best I can” is often dismissed as not good enough. Sometimes, it’s met without challenge and accepted. Forgiven or forgotten. The other day, when we established that no aide would be with us, Burt asked me if IContinue reading “Giving my best. Doing my best”
The confusion
It’s hard to resist the urge to say “really? Really, you don’t know that your first wife was named Susan?” Just one of a series of “really’s” that his infliction brings to the fore. As we’re on a high of successes, his confusion is more unwelcome. I feel it like the contradiction pulling me downContinue reading “The confusion”
Good news
You get some great, amazingly fantastic news. What’s the first thing you do? You share it with the one you love. Right? After that “point of pain,” I also need to share something wonderful. Shortly after we got Burt’s diagnosis, I was rummaging through a closet and found some of the extravagantly sentimental cards BurtContinue reading “Good news”
Gratitude
What do you complain about the most? The caregiver’s journey is often lonely, depressing, and difficult. A recent support group seminar served as a reminder that there is a lot for which to be grateful while caregiving. The Caregiver Teleconnection program from WellMed Charitable Foundation focused on the Positive aspects of the journey. For instance,Continue reading “Gratitude”
this is our life 