Who was I as all my yearsAccumulated? The time isNot a continuum. It breaksInto small scenes, acts asDistinct as if each were aLife encompassed in 15 Minute skits, not all funny.Many poignantly true toLife. So much time passed,Passes unnoticed, goes Into a compartment, aMemory perhaps not alwaysRemembered as it shouldBe. I do know my lastContinue reading “Through the years”
Category Archives: memories
Coffee?
This storefront reminded me that my “coffee quest” goes way back. As soon as I saw it, I was reminded that it had been a very cool coffee bar that Burt and I stopped at years back. Now that I think about it, Burt indulged me whenever I had wanted to try a new coffeeContinue reading “Coffee?”
How we grieve
Is mourning dependent on what we believe? Do our beliefs influence how we grieve? Is there something inexplicable about death, dying, and about mourning? My atheism runs up against my genuine sense that Burt’s always with me. I mean literally, I feel his presence. Spirits and souls are antithetical to the beliefs of an atheist. Yet, thereContinue reading “How we grieve”
Thankful
With Thanksgiving just a few days past, I realize that I had not completed my list of gratitude. It was such an obvious thing that I hadn’t voiced it: I am grateful for Burt. I am grateful that I met him, grateful that I knew him. I am grateful for every moment I had withContinue reading “Thankful”
A playlist
This is a little grieving guideline I want to share with you: Music was a tool that helped us even out the mood with our loved ones while we cared for them. I heard that music that Burt had enjoyed would be best. Now that he’s gone, I again am turning to songs from aContinue reading “A playlist”
A photo of Burt
I love the light that seems to come from within in this photo. I am grateful that I took Burt’s picture at every opportunity. There are so many to admire in memory.
I am so touched
Scrolling through the photos in my phone always brings me to a smile worthy memory. Below, for instance, is one of his Madeleine moments which I may be more tickled by from a prejudiced love of the guy with the cookie. It’s equally nice to remember a Burt from before, and my scroll helps jogContinue reading “I am so touched”
HiProtein O’s
I am still in that crazy but comforting space where Burt is present. While eating protein oats, I am wondering if only I had had Magic Spoon high protein o’s for him could I have prolonged his life? Then I wonder if he would benefit from that; would he want his life extended; would heContinue reading “HiProtein O’s”
Your story
Memory fades. Not just yours, my dear which was strangely altered and crippled by the dementia with which you suffered. Everyone’s. It, like the hearing of which couples complain, can be selective. Or just inaccurate. It was a gift to me when you recounted so much of your life story to me. Some of itContinue reading “Your story”
Yes, dear, I do
Do I miss you, darling?You, of all people, know.You know I miss you, And, even, I’ll bet, howDeeply I miss you. It isIntense, this absence ofYours. Yes, I miss you,Dear. Yet, also, I live myLife, a life different fromThe one we shared, theOne I miss when I say I miss you, darling, so Much. IContinue reading “Yes, dear, I do”
this is our life 