therealtamara

Last night, Burt and I took a walk

It was a dream, of course, and quite lovely. And elaborate. Last night, I dreamt that Burt and I were out walking. We took a short cut through the lobby of a hotel, maybe one I’ve dreamt of before, but not in a long while. It was like my dream version of the Williams Club. Continue reading “Last night, Burt and I took a walk”

A playlist

This is a little grieving guideline I want to share with you: Music was a tool that helped us even out the mood with our loved ones while we cared for them. I heard that music that Burt had enjoyed would be best. Now that he’s gone, I again am turning to songs from aContinue reading “A playlist”

Taxi, taxi

Burt’s dad drove a taxi. I found this cab keychain at an outing at the Museum of the City of New York. I made it a habit of bringing some item home to Burt from my time out of the house. Food was always a hit, tchotchkes (even when they linked to his history) lessContinue reading “Taxi, taxi”

A photo of Burt

I love the light that seems to come from within in this photo. I am grateful that I took Burt’s picture at every opportunity. There are so many to admire in memory.

Have I Told You…

In Say it again, I think I was referencing the old song, Have I Told You Lately That I Love You My friend ACJ thought it might be Do I Love You to which the answer is indeed I do. In exploring the genesis of Have I Told You…, I turned to Spotify or YouTubeContinue reading “Have I Told You…”

Love is in the air

Why do we talk about love so much? I know why I talk about it, to wit We know that the Christmas season could be called the season of love. But, let’s look at some other seasons… in Spring, we say, a young man’s fancy turns to love. Don’t we fall in love with theContinue reading “Love is in the air”

I am so touched

Scrolling through the photos in my phone always brings me to a smile worthy memory. Below, for instance, is one of his Madeleine moments which I may be more tickled by from a prejudiced love of the guy with the cookie. It’s equally nice to remember a Burt from before, and my scroll helps jogContinue reading “I am so touched”

Say it again.

We all need to hear it often. Did I say it as often as I should have? Or, could have? We, none of us, believe we are loved. We need to hear it often. I love you, I would say, to Burt. I truly did, yes, do, love him. Often, he’d raise an eyebrow inContinue reading “Say it again.”

What I did on Burt’s birthday this year

25 years later

Our wedding pictures, blown up to 12x14s, are pinned to the wall by the dining counter. They’re there because at some point Burt wasn’t sure of who I was. This was a Visual Aid. The problem was that at that point neither of us looked like we did on the day that we wed. TheContinue reading “25 years later”