Memory fades. Not just yours, my dear which was strangely altered and crippled by the dementia with which you suffered. Everyone’s. It, like the hearing of which couples complain, can be selective. Or just inaccurate. It was a gift to me when you recounted so much of your life story to me. Some of itContinue reading “Your story (on repeat)”
Category Archives: Grief and Gratitude
From February 26, 2025, Subject: Burt
It feels odd sharing news of Burt’s death in an email or text. It feels odd having that news to share.He lived large and well right up to his last few days. Even during 4 years with dementia he found some connection with people, and pleasure in making that connection. His world shrank dramatically inContinue reading “From February 26, 2025, Subject: Burt”
PickingUp Tickets
Standing by the box office, I realize that this was Burt’s natural habit. He was always, we were always at the box office. Burt, as I no doubt mentioned, loved getting tickets. Seeing an older couple approach the booth, I find myself teary eyed. That was us. Seeing them go to talk to the ticketContinue reading “PickingUp Tickets”
“Gawking…”
It’s in the touristy tradition to find everything we see on our tours «the most beautiful.» That is how I feel about my city. Around and about Which topics would you like to be more informed about? “Gawking at buildings,” that’s how I described my hobby to my future husband even before we met. It’sContinue reading ““Gawking…””
Love-and-marriage.2
We’ve talked about love during caregiving, but I have not been forthright about sex. We don’t talk about that in polite society as my mother would assert. Let’s be honest, LBD destroys intimacy. A visiting carer who came by to see Burt was not circumspect. She suggested I should connect with someone in circumstances likeContinue reading “Love-and-marriage.2”
Reminiscing
Burt was my photo model and this is one of my [many, many] favorite shots. There’s a teasing smirk in the smile, yet the fun is there. He noted when I took pictures of him and was pleased to have the camera turned towards him. I am pleased to have such a treasure trove ofContinue reading “Reminiscing”
The last 5 years
There are so many pictures of Burt, mostly during the journey, but a lot of us at ballgames, on walks having fun. The photos perch on every free surface in both rooms or sit tacked to the wall. Our wedding photos, and an album, are also part of the decor. The photographic reminders take meContinue reading “The last 5 years”
Burt’s memorial plate, my memory
The plaque in memory of Burt is in its place in the God’s Love We Deliver kitchen. I will be checking it out in person soon. It’s fair to say that, in fact, time dulls memory. You want to remember all the highlights from years together. At least I do. And, mostly, I can. SomeContinue reading “Burt’s memorial plate, my memory”
Those last months
Today, thanks to those of you who’ve read my archive of writings in the last few days, I was led to revisit some blog posts from January 2025. These were documenting the last days of our journey. I know that now, so my re-reading was extremely poignant and tearful. I am so grateful for thisContinue reading “Those last months”
