In February, on the 25th- yes, I know it’s still 2 months+ away- it will one year since Burt’s passing. It feels like it’s been so much longer. Not just because he had been going [or gone] for the better part of five years before that. The not-quite a year has moved slowly, dragging inContinue reading “The celebration”
Category Archives: #friends
I ran into…
Last week I ran into a friend who now owns a bar-restaurant that Burt and I frequented; we hug, she offering me condolences and saying now you’ll live your bestlife. Then she’s telling me that Burt was a character. Hearing her assessment is a blessing. That day, I also ran into a Social Worker IContinue reading “I ran into…”
Going where we used to go
There is a reassurance in being bathed in happy memories. And, kind of, adding to them as I do with good friends. Here’s our beloved East Village, dinner was at Ukranian East Village Restaurant. Last night, I enjoyed a dinner (and reminiscences) with my good friend D.
Friendship
Inspired by an episode of IMO Burt had been my best friend in so many ways for the 30 years of our marriage before his illness. We shared so much. We went to lunch and we went to the theater. We even worked together. Listen to the IMO episode where Michelle Obama and her bigContinue reading “Friendship”
By the way
It dawned on me as I described someone as “yes, Burt loved him” that I had said that or something like about alot of the people we met or knew. Burt found many friends over the years, especially as he slipped into dementia. He liked people and this came back in a kind of karmicContinue reading “By the way”
It went so fast
In a rambling dinner conversation, Burt’s favorite aide [and mine] and I inevitably spoke of him. His idiosyncracies over the rules of laundry and eager attendance to the mailbox were still part of daily living when she began. Only toward the end, in the last few months, did Burt think I was just never here. MyContinue reading “It went so fast”
Community
My friend and neighbor D was one of those who watched over us. Another neighbor has been urging me to get a dog. She thinks a small dog would be best. She, as people do, really loves her dog. Burt had been fearful around dogs, and I think she took it a little personally whenContinue reading “Community”
Esplanade
D and I made plans to take a walk today. The weather’s been mild. Maybe we’ll cross the bridge that goes over the FDR to the Riverwalk. Burt and I used to walk there all the time. I mean, before he got sick, too. For a while, when he was still walking, we would goContinue reading “Esplanade”
It’s heavy
In my encounters with friends and acquaintances, I feel heavy. Physically, of course, I am. It is the sorrow I carry in my heart that makes me feel weightier. This, I think, at each conversation is not the gravitas I hoped to achieve. I have toned down the impulse to spill it all. I noContinue reading “It’s heavy”
Collateral damage
Burt is in the line of fire as Lewy takes more and more of his self. I feel for his losses as I do for my own. He spoke of himself in the third person today. “Does Burt know?,” he asked. I don’t understand so much of what he utters these days, but I heardContinue reading “Collateral damage”
this is our life 