The last five years have been harder on me than I felt as they rolled along. Caregiving is an encompassing experience. It holds your focus; your loved one keeps you focused on doing for…. Burt was the center for my worry and care. I was a model for selfcare, I say with no boast orContinue reading “The sun will”
Author Archives: TheRealTamara
Time spent together
Was Burt perfect? Well, of course. Oh, you’re serious. No, of course not. The moments I conjure now are perfect. The ones over the last years may also be tinged with sadness. Of course. The ones from before his sad long illness are glimpses into a happy life. Often they are little things that areContinue reading “Time spent together”
Along the way
I have met and observed others treading the hallowed ground of this dementia, the Lewy Body disease. This poem is a tribute to one such fellow traveler. She of the perpetual sorrowShe carries her dread but isNot sure what it is she fearsHer fear is real but she fearsIt may be just the dread ofContinue reading “Along the way”
In my corner 2
I stepped out onto our street after speaking of how thoroughly and well Burt had looked after me. My hope was [and is] that he still does. Here’s the proof on the block: Thank you.
In my corner
He always cheered for me. Burt was always my champion, even in areas he personally had no interest. Zumba classes. My poetry. Things he would never do, although he dutifully and lovingly listened to my poems. He encouraged me. He enlightened me. His insights, some made during the years of his slow decline, were oftenContinue reading “In my corner”
In memory of
Burton P.- the man I love A pictorial of our recent past
The process
Grieving is a process that involves and invokes memories. Thanks to the volubility of my deeply missed beloved, I have lots of memories, even from his childhood. Burt told me many stories. I learned of the running board on his grandfather’s truck; the grandfather with whom he planted cucumbers. I heard how he met hisContinue reading “The process”
Missing
From beginning to end, it was not a sudden event. It felt like a long journey and also as if it all transpired in a flash. Dementia slowly steals faculties, alters personality, changes the conversation. Once upon years before, we shared ideas and interests, exchanged thoughts and had meaningful communication. Once upon… I thrilled atContinue reading “Missing”
All of a Sudden
Burt was my companion, my love, my guide, my partner, my pal for so many years and then he started withdrawing. That was not a conscious withdrawal but one he could not control. It was caused by the dementia that was also causing him to lose himself. Lost and not lost, as I have said,Continue reading “All of a Sudden”
