Speaking of the day of hearts and flowers, and I did mention it, this is another particularly difficult holiday. It’s that love stuff that gets us. Most of us have seen our marriages transformed by Lewy [or, really, any dementia]. Intimacy is not what it used to be. Love, of course, is a resilient andContinue reading “Valentines”
Author Archives: TheRealTamara
Speaking of gratitude
As I suggested to you, because it was suggested to me, it really helps us focus on the caring when we note at least one positive interaction with the one we love. I dare say, this is true in civilian life also but for us who are caregivers, it’s a monumental help. I had twoContinue reading “Speaking of gratitude”
The practice of care
Best practices include the care of our darlings but as caregivers we need to look out for ourselves. Care for the caregiver includes respite, a topic dear to me and upon which I have expostulated at length. Self-care can and should be done in the company of others. Spend time with friends. I have lunchContinue reading “The practice of care”
Best practices
One of my goals for this site is to offer guidance where I can. I want to list some ideas and tips that I have found handy on our journey. 1. Burt had some trouble vis a vis food early on. It worried me. I was feeding him lots of lemon meeingue pie and eggsContinue reading “Best practices”
Art for art’s sake
Squid Pro Quo is part of my respite care. I participate in a program that uses art as a tool for connection. The respite for me has added value because the other artists are not caregivers. It’s more a general population (albeit all of us older adults) group. It has been very soul-satisfying to me.
Basic Burt
In the course of an hour or so, Burt was holding on tight to his aide’s hand. He took mine with his free hand and continued an elaborate explanation. His chat was freewheeling and pleasant. He’s been sweet like this of late. No arguments or accusations. This is Burt down to his basic self. He’sContinue reading “Basic Burt”
Neglect
Sometimes, it feels like I am so torn up over the national outrage as it swirls around that I am not paying enough attention to my guy. Before you voice any alarm, know that I dearly love him. I will always tend to his needs. Love feeds and fuels me, so I am happy toContinue reading “Neglect”
Lonely
Caregiving is lonely. I’m sure I have lamented this in numerous posts. Burt seems like he’s pretty lonely, too. If you have a pwd, your person might also be feeling lonely. I need to be a bit more hands-on empathetic. It’s hard to stick with him when he’s not making sense. He’s lonely even withContinue reading “Lonely”
Short bursts of energy
There’s a support group that «puts the I in caregiver« which I value for its honesty. It’s akin to the one urging us «to be selfish.« I take about 5 hours for myself each day. It’s a necessary indulgence. Let me try to explain what my time away does to benefit me. When I getContinue reading “Short bursts of energy”
Alternate world
If you are living with a person with dementia and particularly this dementia, you know that your person spends much of his day in an alternate reality. There are delusions and theories that give credence to and explain them. Hallucinations are common occupants in the world of your loved one’s with LBD. Burt’s hallucinatory companionsContinue reading “Alternate world”
this is our life 