TheRealTamara

Mental health

Holding onto our mental health is not just taking interventions to keep depression at bay. As we get older, we worry about dementia. Forgetfulness sparks fear. Intervening for cognitive health seems like a good idea. I blog to keep my mind going. I do puzzles, albeit the Easy Sudoku and a mini crossword are myContinue reading “Mental health”

Down up up? Down? Up

Among those caring for the Lewy- afflicted, LBD is referred to as a roller-coaster. I hated those before embarking on our Lewy journey. As you can guess, I am not a fan of the wild ride now. Lewy Body Dementia is unpredictable. Lows can be followed by some highs. Or at least some regained ground.Continue reading “Down up up? Down? Up”

Compassion

Robbed of everything meaningful, the pwd in your life progressively declines a little further. Disease progression is relentless. Burt is a poor patient. He resists being prodded, guided, and helped. It makes those doing what’s best for him and doing their best feel like giving up. At best, it’s exasperating. In these instances, remembering whoContinue reading “Compassion”

Memories

I will remember this: My goal in having weekend help was to get Burt out more. The first weekend was a bust. An unhappy Burt gave up inside our courtyard. On the second day, he seemed eager but did not like the outing. Finally, we made it past the grumbles to a nice sit inContinue reading “Memories”

Doubling up

My objection to the use of the plural pronoun is documented elsewhere. This annoying (to me) linguist twist finds its way into Burt’s vocabulary by way of reduplicative paranesia. “When are they coming?,” Burt asks. “He works alone,” I say about his PT, “and he’ll be here at 4 pm.” He had two weekend aides,Continue reading “Doubling up”

Old Haunts

Everything nearby can be a trigger for memories and the sadness they evoke. When I passed the cafe at Sotheby’s today, I was mildly cheered that it no longer occupied the top floor. Burt and I had eaten on the rooftop terrace for years. I miss being able to do that with him. Of course,Continue reading “Old Haunts”

Know what?

Bette Midler as my jam today was in contradiction to the pity party I was engaging in. Burt tends to make less sense than ever of late. He still expects me to fill in all the blanks. He’ll cite a destination for an activity of an unspecified type. I am charged with knowing both whereContinue reading “Know what?”

Did I mention?

Anxiety is a huge factor in Lewy Body Dementia. I presume that those who were calm and composed prior to dx experience bouts of this distress once they enter Lewy-land. Burt had more than his share for years before any symptoms. In fact, he was plagued by lifelong panic attacks. His illness has made theContinue reading “Did I mention?”

This

Musings

Did this hardship come along To crush my spirit? To enrich my skills as a poet of feelings? To test and strengthen my heart? The “why me” and the “why us” are a miserable way to greet adversity. Miserable. And often hard to avoid or circumvent. “Hard” means more difficult, not impossible. Or impassable. CourageContinue reading “Musings”