This morning, Burt asked me what I was doing yesterday. I said I was in the park with you. “I didn’t see you. Why didn’t you come say hello?” It now occurs to me that Burt is antsy in the park when he doesn’t realize I am with him.
Author Archives: therealtamara
Funny
A friend was struck by a Burt response – asked to color, he said, “me and my friends discussed it and we don’t do that kind of work.” She said, “That’s hilarious.” It is. It brought me to the question, “Isn’t it strange that although he no longer has logic, he can still be intentionallyContinue reading “Funny”
Got to get a hobby
What is your favorite hobby or pastime? In the last post here, I had a chance to investigate “leisure activities” for Burt. Mine are less nuanced. I used to love trying artsy craftsy things to do. I once made a beautifully resonating drum. I also potted a decidedly clunky piece of clay; I was aimingContinue reading “Got to get a hobby”
A job
Did I mention Burt’s desire to get a job? Actually, he’s been on a hunt for work for a while now. In some cases, his “bad” wife was the impediment. [I wouldn’t join him at the job, and my doing that was a requirement for his getting it.] Other times, he felt they were tooContinue reading “A job”
Home away
It’s a quandary we face. The person we love and married is no longer the same. I miss him all the time. Life with a p.w.d. is far from easy. Is this the right time to place him or her in a residential home? A social worker once told me, “You will know when theContinue reading “Home away”
That village
It takes a village. Hillary Clinton on bringing up children but applies as well to how society runs Good neighbors. They have provided continuing support for me. My personal cavalry when, one day, Burt was so agitated about going out to the street that he rammed his walker against a wall. Down he went. AContinue reading “That village”
Awareness
In trying to keep a positive attitude over our situation, I also try to find humor when I can. This doesn’t mean that dementia is not a dreadful disease. As it is Lewy Body Awareness Month, we need to stay aware of just how devastating LBD is. All dementias occur as some necessary protein inContinue reading “Awareness”
LBD Awareness
A year ago, I commemorated Oct, Lewy Body Awareness Month, by beginning this chronicle of our journey. October marks 4 years since Burt was diagnosed. It is not a happy anniversary. Nonetheless, I remain grateful that I can still enjoy him. We are having some rough times, but he is still my delight. I amContinue reading “LBD Awareness”
Advocacy
A provider is giving me a hard time over my healthcare proxy. They’ve refused to discuss Burt’s plan of care until they vet my proxy. This morning, while mulling my frustration, I thought oh come on. I have the marriage certificate.* That should be proof enough. [*Side note: a beautiful copy of this docunent arrivedContinue reading “Advocacy”
Recognition
Burt has times when he is sure I am one of “6 to 20” wives. Which one are you? Honestly – although I call this schizophrenia by proxy, – I am glad that, if he’s confused, he asks. This query about who and which at 6 or 7 pm always puts me in a bigContinue reading “Recognition”
this is our life 